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Eric Holdt
29th June 2006, 06:22 AM
Just taking a quick breather from our Rune Soldier fic to write this little
sudden burst of inspiration. This is the second of our Naruto
Crack-Pairings one-shot fics (for those who missed the first and would like
to read it, let me know and I'll resend it). A lot of people seem to be
against non-cannon pairings, but personally, I like to think that it's much
more of a challenge to write an acceptable fic with non-cannon couples than
it is to write an acceptable fic with people who are 'supposed' to be
together. That's just me, of course. And hopefully this one is acceptable,
otherwise I've completely screwed myself over before I've even started the
damn fic.

But enough of my ramblings. On to the story!


Dragon-Stiel Inc. Presents:
Checkmate
A Naruto one-shot


-----
Standard Disclaimer: All characters and settings in this fic are the
property of Masashi Kishimoto and whoever else he's ever sold the rights
too. No permission, no profit, all in fun. Please enjoy!
-----


"Checkmate."

Hyuuga Hinata stared at the chessboard before her, completely aghast.

"You...you beat me...in only six turns," she whispered in awe.

Nara Shikamaru leaned back in his seat and gave her a small apologetic
smile. "Sorry, it's been such a long time since I've played against anyone
other than Asuma-sensei. I'll go easier next time."

Hinata sighed. "Could we play again?"

Shikamaru shrugged. "Why not? Neither of us has anything better to do
today, right?"

She nodded as they began rearranging their chess pieces. Even if it was
something that she wasn't very good at, Hinata was happy for the distraction
the game brought to her. It had been several months now since Naruto had
gone off on his special training trip, and Hinata had steadily grown more
depressed at his absence; not to mention the fact that she hadn't even been
able to tell him goodbye. Ever since, Kiba and Shino had both been going
out of their way to cheer their teammate back up, which she appreciated
greatly.

But then a week ago, after Shino and that Temari girl had gotten together,
they'd been spending quite a bit of time with each other. And while Hinata
didn't have anything against the kunoichi of the Sand, the constant
arguments between the two and the...activities that often followed were a
little too uncomfortable for the overly shy girl to handle. And then Kiba
had been put in the hospital after Temari found out about the pictures he
had taken of them kissing. Hinata was soon finding herself incredibly bored
and lonely without either of her teammates and the almost painful lack of
missions to keep her busy. Of course, she had visited Kiba a few times,
mostly just sitting in a chair by his bed in silence while he mumbled rather
incoherently about cheap shots and getting revenge on the psycho desert
witch. Hinata was really hoping Kiba wouldn't be stupid enough to call
Temari that while she was around.

But even someone as kind-hearted as Hinata couldn't put up with that for
long. It had been a stroke of good fortune that she had come across
Shikamaru shortly after her most recent visit to her crippled teammate.

After repositioning all his pieces, Shikamaru stole a quick glance at the
girl sitting opposite of him. When she had run into him after his class had
ended, they'd ended up making small talk about missions and training until
Hinata had noticed the chessboard that he had left out from his morning game
with Asuma. She mentioned that she'd never played much before, and even
though he'd offered to teach her a bit, he had been certain that he'd be
regretting it soon, and fully expecting to be in for a long and troublesome
day.

But after spending only a short time in the Hyuuga heir's company, Shikamaru
came to the surprising conclusion that Hinata was anything but
'troublesome'. Unlike so many of the other girls he knew, she wasn't loud,
boastful, obnoxious, violent, or any other quality that he had assumed were
common traits in all females. It turned out to be just the opposite; she
was quiet, which suited him fine, since it meant not having any need to make
so much troublesome conversation. She also listened patiently as he
explained the rules of the game, and quite frankly, he happened to find her
shy, reclusive behavior to be rather relaxing; not to mention kind of
attractive, if he were to be so bold as to think so.

Once the game was all set up again, Hinata made the first move, moving her
far left pawn forward, causing a soft clack of wood on wood. "Um...how
exactly did you get so good at this game, Shikamaru-kun?"

"Lots of practice," he answered as he lazily slid one of his own pawns
forward. "When I was younger I used to play a lot of different games with
my parents, mostly my dad." He watched her move another pawn and quickly
answered in kind. "At first I would lose a lot, because I didn't take the
time to consider all of my moves. But after a few weeks, I was beating them
both all the time. Not long after I became a Genin, I started playing chess
at least once everyday. By then I was so good at it that he still hasn't
beaten me to this day."

"That's amazing," Hinata commented as she moved her left bishop several
spaces out. "I wish I had that sort of talent with something."

Shikamaru frowned and slid another piece forward. "Everyone has their own
special talent, Hinata-chan. Just because you haven't found yours yet
doesn't mean it's not there."

Hinata felt a faint blush across her cheeks but remained silent as she used
her bishop to capture one of Shikamaru's pawns.

The two played on in silence for several turns until Hinata stopped and
stared at the board in confusion. Shikamaru, in an attempt to challenge
himself more, had closed his eyes so as not to see his opponent's moves, and
didn't notice the pause in the game right away.

"Um...Shikamaru-kun?"

"Hmm?"

"Well...how uh...how do you move the knights again?"

Shikamaru grinned and rolled his still closed eyes, slightly amused at how
embarrassed the girl sounded over such a simple thing. He leaned forward
and placed his finger on an open square of the board. "Knights move three
spaces at a time; forward, backward, and to the side, two spaces in one
direction, and one space perpendicular." He demonstrated by tracing his
finger over each possible path the particular knight in question could move.
"Knights are also the only piece that can jump over other pieces."

Hinata nodded in understanding and quickly moved her knight forward and to
the right.

Shikamaru hid another smile as he noticed the trap that Hinata was trying to
set up. After a quick assessment of the board and deciding that it wouldn't
hurt him any, he captured her pawn with a bishop. He felt an unfamiliar
shiver travel through him as Hinata's eyes lit up as she captured the bishop
with her knight, smiling proudly at her accomplishment. He quickly brought
his focus back to the board, but for some reason couldn't bring himself to
ruin her mood by capturing the knight with his rook like he'd intended, and
instead opted to capture another of her pawns with his other bishop.

The game went on for several more minutes, with Hinata eventually losing
three more pawns, a rook and a knight, and Shikamaru losing two pawns and
his other bishop. Both had yet to move their king or queen piece.

"Shikamaru-kun?"

Clack.

"Hmm?"

Clack.

"Is it true that some people used to use this game to plan for missions and
wars?"

Clack.

"Well, sort of. It's not as though they used it to plan battles, per say.
That'd be next to impossible in most cases. It was more of a way to better
understand a battle by honing one's strategy." Clack. "Chess and war are
basically the same, except for the whole troublesome danger factor. You
have to learn to anticipate what your opponent is going to do." Clack.
"That way you can form a suitable counter-strategy that they won't be
expecting." So saying, he captured Hinata's second knight.

Hinata, now worried about having both her knights gone, didn't answer. She
placed her fingers to her lips in thought, then slowly brought her queen out
and placed it a few squares below Shikamaru's knight.

Shikamaru scanned the board again before pushing his far side pawn down a
square. "There have also been people who, during war times, have made
connections between certain chess pieces and themselves or their soldiers,"
he informed her.

Hinata, a bit cautious about Shikamaru's decision to not move his knight to
safety, paused to make sure it was safe to capture it. Seeing that there
was nothing to stop her, she did just that. She then noted that she was now
in position to capture his rook on the next turn so long as he didn't move
it. "What do you mean?" she finally asked.

Shikamaru ignored his vulnerable rook and instead moved the same pawn
forward again. "Well, take my team, for instance. Now, Chouji is a really
straightforward, head-on kind of guy. He doesn't use a whole lot of
planning when he fights, because his brute strength gives him more of an
edge in up-front confrontations. Since that's the case, his style would
best resemble a rook."

Hinata nodded in understanding, then moved her queen to take the unprotected
rook; realizing that doing so now put her in line to take his other knight.
She smiled to herself; it looked as though she was coming closer to gaining
the upper hand.

"Ino, on the other hand, is like a polar opposite to Chouji," he continued
as he once again pushed his pawn forward. "Her techniques and abilities
aren't very useful in straightforward conflicts, but they are helpful for
catching an opponent by surprise, attacking from a blind side, or setting up
an attack for someone else. So what piece do you suppose she resembles?"

Hinata paused in her move to think. "Um...a bishop, maybe?"

Shikamaru nodded. "Exactly. A piece that can only move diagonally isn't
exactly ideal on its own, but when used in combination with other pieces, it
can be very helpful."

Hinata nodded again. "I get it. Then, what piece are you, Shikamaru-kun?"

"A king," he said simply, causing Hinata to blink in surprise at the abrupt
answer. He grinned. "I'm sure that sounds egotistical of me, but honestly
it isn't. A king's only redeeming feature is that if it's taken, the game's
over. But even though the king can move in any direction, it can only move
one square per turn, which makes it next to worthless to use. My fighting
skills, like the king's, are better off left in the background, where I can
put my better abilities to use, like giving advice to others, and staying
out of danger," he said with a small smirk.

Hinata listened in silence, then moved her queen to take Shikamaru's
remaining knight. She now found herself faced with the problem of getting
his own queen out of the way in order to take his king.

"So," Shikamaru said, moving his second rook a few spaces to the side.
"You've heard mine, Hinata-chan, so tell me what piece you find yourself
most comparable with."

Hinata was silent for a moment before bowing her head and whispering, "A
pawn."

The young genius frowned. "Do tell," he urged.

Hinata sighed and slowly pushed her remaining rook up. "I...I'm not good at
anything when it comes to fighting. I'm from the most prominent family in
all of Konoha, yet my little sister has always managed to excel everything
that I fail at. I train as hard as I can, but it seems like no matter how
much I think I improve, I just end up getting in the way of the other's when
we're on a mission. Even in my own family, everyone knows that it should be
Neji-neesan who carries on the bloodline of the Main Branch, not me."

Shikamaru could almost sense tears about to fall from the pearl-white eyes
of Hinata, but remained silent and moved his rook up to the top of his half
of the board.

Even from her current state of self-loathing, Hinata could see victory in
sight for her. She sent her queen up to capture the rook that Shikamaru had
just moved. If things played out right, she could win in three turns.

Shikamaru stared quietly at Hinata, then looked down at the board. "You're
probably right."

She felt a pang of grief in her chest at hearing him agree with her, but
told herself he was just being honest. If it had been Shino or Kiba or
Kurenai, they would surely have lied and tried to reassure her that she
wasn't as worthless as she really was.

"But on the other hand," the super genius continued as he returned his
attention to his pawn, moving it forward again. "I don't think you give
pawns enough credit."

"Why not?" she asked as she placed her bishop two spaces below his queen,
knowing that he couldn't capture it without putting his king in danger.
"All pawns do is slow down your other pieces and all they're good for are
sacrificing."

Shikamaru smiled. "Not quite. Think about this: unless it's attacking, a
pawn can only move in one direction, and that's forward." He demonstrated
by moving his pawn once more. "That, by some accounts, would be taken as
having determination. Even though they can only move one space, they're
always striving forward, in an attempt to better themselves...like you."

Hinata felt her cheeks begin to burn again as she moved her second bishop up
next to the first, blocking any escape his king would be able to make on the
next turn.

"And," Shikamaru added, sliding his pawn one last space, and then reaching
down to remove it from the board. "If it works hard enough, even something
as insignificant as a pawn," he pulled a spare queen from the box and placed
it where his pawn had been. "-Can turn itself into a queen."

Hinata stared in shock, having completely overlooked that rule to the game
when Shikamaru had explained it earlier. Then, as his words began to sink
into her, she realized something else.

"Checkmate," he said with a small grin.

She saw that her king had no way of escaping. She had tried not to make the
mistake she had made in the last game by leaving it unguarded, and instead
had left several pieces in front and beside it. But since she had moved her
two bishops and queen out to attack, it had left her side with Shikamaru's
new queen wide open, and the only place she could move to avoid it was being
blocked off by another of his pawns. She had been so excited over the
prospect of capturing all of his strong pieces, only to have ended up beaten
by two of his weakest ones.

While she should have felt disappointed at the thought of losing while being
one move away from victory, Hyuuga Hinata found herself feeling remarkably
happy.

"Thank you, Shikamaru-kun."

Shikamaru answered with one of his lazy grins. "Play again?"

Hinata smiled back and nodded.

It took some time, but eventually, Hinata finally captured the king.

End


Well, it was my first attempt at writing anything truely WAFFy, so I pray
that it goes over well.

Eric 'Dragonboy' Holdt

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The Eternal Lost Lurker
29th June 2006, 01:13 PM
> Hinata sighed and slowly pushed her remaining rook up. "I...I'm not good
at
> anything when it comes to fighting. I'm from the most prominent family in
> all of Konoha, yet my little sister has always managed to excel everything
> that I fail at. I train as hard as I can, but it seems like no matter how
> much I think I improve, I just end up getting in the way of the other's
when
> we're on a mission. Even in my own family, everyone knows that it should
be
> Neji-neesan who carries on the bloodline of the Main Branch, not me."

'niisan', unless Neji's not telling people something.

> "But on the other hand," the super genius continued as he returned his
> attention to his pawn, moving it forward again. "I don't think you give
> pawns enough credit."

Just for the record, I saw THIS coming from the moment he started moving
that one pawn every turn. Also for the record, I *hate* pawnpushers.

> Shikamaru smiled. "Not quite. Think about this: unless it's attacking,
a
> pawn can only move in one direction, and that's forward." He demonstrated
> by moving his pawn once more. "That, by some accounts, would be taken as
> having determination. Even though they can only move one space, they're
> always striving forward, in an attempt to better themselves...like you."

Awww.

> "And," Shikamaru added, sliding his pawn one last space, and then reaching
> down to remove it from the board. "If it works hard enough, even
something
> as insignificant as a pawn," he pulled a spare queen from the box and
placed
> it where his pawn had been. "-Can turn itself into a queen."

Yep.

> It took some time, but eventually, Hinata finally captured the king.

Hee. Nice one. :)

================================
Please do not stare at my crotch.
~~*~~
The Eternal Lost Lurker
www.lurkerdrome.com



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Joel N. Fischoff
29th June 2006, 02:48 PM
>against non-cannon pairings, but personally, I like to think that it's
>much

Canon. 'Cannon' has an entirely different meaning, one that has more to do
with large amounts of gunpowder and large metal balls. Of course, that
could be what you're going for here. :-P

>Hyuuga Hinata stared at the chessboard before her, completely aghast.
>"You...you beat me...in only six turns," she whispered in awe.

Somehow, these two lines don't seem to match. Perhaps have Hinata's aghast
look turn to a subtle smile or something like that?


>But then a week ago, after Shino and that Temari girl had gotten together,

Wait, wait. Are you implying that Shino actually has *emotions*? ;-)


>'troublesome'. Unlike so many of the other girls he knew, she wasn't
>loud,
>boastful, obnoxious, violent, or any other quality that he had assumed
>were
>common traits in all females.

Wait until he's dealt with her when she's having her, ah, monthly
difficulties. It's the quiet ones ya gotta watch.

(ObCarlin: Of course, while you're watching the quiet ones, the noisy ones
will f***in' kill you!)


>"Um...Shikamaru-kun?"

Hm. I'm not sure even at her most comfortable that Hinata would refer to
Shikamaru as 'kun'. She's the type for formality, and she doesn't know him
that well.


>his focus back to the board, but for some reason couldn't bring himself to
>ruin her mood by capturing the knight with his rook like he'd intended,
>and

You're doomed, Nara-kun. ;)


>"Well, sort of. It's not as though they used it to plan battles, per say.

It's 'per se'. That's one of those words that's much easier to use in
speech rather than writing.


>She then noted that she was now in position to capture his rook on
>the next turn so long as he didn't move it.

'Perhaps I should do some practice on my kunoichi training. A sexy pout or
something,' she thought to herself. Not that anything would come of it, of
course, but a girl's gotta use all the tools she's got!

(grinning, ducking, running away very fast)


>Hinata paused in her move to think. "Um...a bishop, maybe?"

Smart girl, our Hinata.


>"You've heard mine, Hinata-chan, so tell me what piece you find yourself
>most comparable with."

That's a dangerous question to ask, Shikamaru.


>Hinata was silent for a moment before bowing her head and whispering, "A
>pawn."

See?


>all of Konoha, yet my little sister has always managed to excel everything

excel in everything


>much I think I improve, I just end up getting in the way of the other's
>when

No apostrophe, I think.


>Neji-neesan who carries on the bloodline of the Main Branch, not me."

Heh. Neji's a girl, Neji's a girl, nyah nyah nyah nyah nyah! ;-P


>Shikamaru could almost sense tears about to fall from the pearl-white eyes

At which point, the similarities between Shikamaru and *every other boy*
would appear, since noone could bear to see Hinata-chan cry.


I liked it, though chess has never been my game. I used to play it when I
was *much* younger, but I don't think I have in decades.


Joel

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Aaron Nowack
30th June 2006, 06:20 PM
Eric Holdt wrote:
> Just taking a quick breather from our Rune Soldier fic to write this little
> sudden burst of inspiration. This is the second of our Naruto
> Crack-Pairings one-shot fics (for those who missed the first and would like
> to read it, let me know and I'll resend it).

Ah, I remember that one. The Shino/Temari, right?

> A lot of people seem to be
> against non-cannon pairings, but personally, I like to think that it's much
> more of a challenge to write an acceptable fic with non-cannon couples than
> it is to write an acceptable fic with people who are 'supposed' to be
> together. That's just me, of course.

Canon, not cannon.

If only more of the people writing non-canon pairings _realized_ that it
was tougher and actually did the work to make it plausible.

> -----
> Standard Disclaimer: All characters and settings in this fic are the
> property of Masashi Kishimoto and whoever else he's ever sold the rights
> too. No permission, no profit, all in fun. Please enjoy!
> -----

Standard C&C Disclaimer: All the below is my only occasionally useful
humble opinion, my only occasionally correct grammatical and spelling
corrections, and/or my only occasionally funny humor.

Special Disclaimer: There seems to have been rather a lot of discussion
about this fic. I didn't follow that, so forgive any duplication of
issues that have been dealt with to death.

> She nodded as they began rearranging their chess pieces. Even if it was
> something that she wasn't very good at, Hinata was happy for the distraction
> the game brought to her. It had been several months now since Naruto had
> gone off on his special training trip, and Hinata had steadily grown more
> depressed at his absence; not to mention the fact that she hadn't even been
> able to tell him goodbye.

Should be a comma after absence, not a semi-colon.

> But then a week ago, after Shino and that Temari girl had gotten together,
> they'd been spending quite a bit of time with each other.

*gasp* Continuity!

> And while Hinata
> didn't have anything against the kunoichi of the Sand, the constant
> arguments between the two and the...activities that often followed were a
> little too uncomfortable for the overly shy girl to handle.


"the kunoichi of the Sand" (to me at least) makes it sound like Temari
is is the only kunoichi in that village. Suggest "from the Sand" instead.

> She also listened patiently as he
> explained the rules of the game, and quite frankly, he happened to find her
> shy, reclusive behavior to be rather relaxing; not to mention kind of
> attractive, if he were to be so bold as to think so.

Semi-colon should be a comma again. Also, this sentence is very long
and over-complicated; suggest splitting it up some.
> Shikamaru frowned and slid another piece forward. "Everyone has their own
> special talent, Hinata-chan. Just because you haven't found yours yet
> doesn't mean it's not there."

Just a note: in Naruto, for whatever reason, the genin don't really seem
to use "-chan" with their female classmates (with the exception of
Naruto to Sakura), instead just using the name with no suffix.

I know that at least according to the explanations of suffixes I've read
this should be overly familiar, but that's the way it is (unless I'm
recalling incorrectly, of course).

> "Well, sort of. It's not as though they used it to plan battles, per say.

per se, I think.

> Hinata sighed and slowly pushed her remaining rook up. "I...I'm not good at
> anything when it comes to fighting. I'm from the most prominent family in
> all of Konoha, yet my little sister has always managed to excel everything
> that I fail at. I train as hard as I can, but it seems like no matter how
> much I think I improve, I just end up getting in the way of the other's when
> we're on a mission.

"others", not "other's"

Even in my own family, everyone knows that it should be
> Neji-neesan who carries on the bloodline of the Main Branch, not me."

-neesan is for sisters, you want "-niisan"


> Well, it was my first attempt at writing anything truely WAFFy, so I pray
> that it goes over well.

Worked for me. The metaphor was pretty easy to see coming, but that's
not really a flaw I don't think.

So, what's the next one going to be? :)

--
Aaron Nowack
"Never let reality get in the way of a good hypothesis."
http://www.mimiru.net/

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David Johnston
30th June 2006, 07:06 PM
Aaron Nowack wrote:


> Just a note: in Naruto, for whatever reason, the genin don't really seem
> to use "-chan" with their female classmates (with the exception of
> Naruto to Sakura), instead just using the name with no suffix.
>
> I know that at least according to the explanations of suffixes I've read
> this should be overly familiar, but that's the way it is (unless I'm
> recalling incorrectly, of course).
>

It's more like "brusque" than familiar, I think. The guys aren't being
familiar so much as addressing the girls as if they were just more guys
and they simply don't have time to waste on another syllable.

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